Accident insurance claim forms ask for a
brief statement about how the accident
happened . The combination of the finger
pointing instinct and the small spaces
provided on the forms can lead to some
curiously phrased explanations.Car Accidents:* "A pedestrian hit me and went under my
car."* "The other car collided with mine
without giving warning of its intention."* "I had been learning to drive with
power steering. I turned the wheel to
what I thought was enough and found
myself in a different direction going
the opposite way."* "Coming home, I drove into the wrong
house and collided with a tree I don't
have."
< br>* "I thought my window was down; but
found it was up when I put my hand
through it."* "No one was to blame for the accident,
but it never would have happened if the
other driver had been alert."* "The pedestrian had no idea which
direction to go, so I ran over him."* "I saw the slow-moving, sad-faced old
gentleman as he bounced off the hood of
my car."* "I had been driving for 40 years when
I fell asleep at the wheel and had an
accident."* "I was taking my canary to the
hospital. It got loose in the car and
flew out the window. The next thing I
saw was his rear end, and there was a
crash." * "I was backing my car out of the
driveway in the usual manner when it was
struck by the other car in the same
place where it had been struck several
times before."* "The indirect cause of this accident
was a little guy in a small car with a
big mouth."* "The accident happened when the right
door of a car came around the corner
without giving a signal."* "I was thrown from my car as it left
the road. I was later found in a ditch
by some stray cows."* "I had been shopping for plants all
day and was on my way home. As I reached
an intersection, a hedge sprung up,
obscuring my vision."* "I was on the way to the doctor with
rear end trouble when my universal joint
gave way causing me to have an accident."* "I was sure the old fellow would never
make it to the other side of the road
when I struck him."* "I told the police that I was not
injured, but on removing my hat, I found
that I had a fractured skull."* "My wench slipped, losing my balance,
and I hurt my back."* "I was unable to stop in time, and my
car crashed into the other vehicle. The
driver and passengers then left
immediately for a vacation with injuries."* "To avoid hitting the bumper of the
car in front, I struck the pedestrian." * "The accident occurred when I was
attempting to bring my car out of a skid
by steering it into the other vehicle."* "When I could not avoid a collision, I
stepped on the gas and crashed into the
other car."* "I collided with a stationary truck
coming the other way."* "In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove
into a telephone pole."* "My car was legally parked as it
backed into the other vehicle."* "As I approached the intersection, a
stop sign suddenly appeared in a place
where no stop sign had ever appeared
before. I was unable to stop in time to
avoid the accident."* "The telephone pole was approaching
fast. I was attempting to swerve out of
its path when it struck my front end."* "A truck backed though my windshield
and into my wife's face."* "I pulled away from the side of the
road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and
headed over the embankment." * "The guy was all over the road. I had
to swerve a number of times before I hit
him." * "An invisible car came out of nowhere,
struck my vehicle, and vanished."Ot her Accidents:* "My finger hit the band saw, damaging it."Insuranc e Form Anecdotes:* In France, not very long ago, the
forms used for notifying insurers of
accident, illness, or pregnancy were
based on the same mold. Consequently,
exp ectant mothers were asked, "Was the
accident caused by some third party?"
Invariabl y, the answer was, "No, only by
my husband."