Funny Fish Joke #1:

A young zealous boy wanted desperately to work at a department store. He approached the store manager who responded they needed no help.

Quite persistent, the boy returned again and again until the manager finally said "We're having a holiday sale tomorrow. Why don't you show up and you can give it a try."

The elated boy returned the following day and proceeded to sell. At the end of the day the store manager called the youngster over and asked how he had done.

The boy responded that he had sold $79,083.50 worth of merchandise. The manager asked how he had done so well.

The young man said,

"Well this guy was going fishing so I asked if he wanted some fish hooks, he said sure, That's $1.50.”

“I asked if he had a nice fishing pole, he said no, so I got a graphite extension pole for $43.50”.

“Do you have a nice reel, not yet replied the customer... so I got him a nice quick release reel for $35.00.”

“I asked where he was going fishing and he said Strawberry Reservoir. I told him the best places to catch fish are near the center.”

"Do you have a boat? The man said he didn't so I set him up with a nice outboard 30 foot cruiser for $28,000.00.”

“Then I asked if he had a trailer. He didn't, so I got him a double axle trailer for $3,000.00.”

“Then I asked what he had to tow the boat. He only had a station wagon, so I told him that just wouldn't do, but we could get him a nice fully loaded Dodge Ram dually, racked and packed with a tow package, trailer hitch and everything for $48,000.00.”

“He wanted it all."

As you can imagine the store manager was astounded.

"And to think it all began with that man asking for a package of fish hooks?"

The boy replied, "Oh no, it all began with him asking for some tampons which were $3.50, so I replied, Well you aren't going to be doing much else this weekend, you might as well go fishing!"

(Contributed by Joe Mason)

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Funny Fish Joke #2:

L ittle Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked,

"Whatcha doing, Tim?"

"My goldfish died," replied the boy tearfully, without looking up. "And I've just buried him."

The neighbor was concerned. "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"

Tim patted down the last heap of earth then replied, "That's because he's inside your cat."

(Contributed by anonymous)

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Funny Fish Joke #3:

A fish goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack.

So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go

on a long vacation .”

Patti looks at the fish in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.

The fish says “$30,000.”

The teller asks his name and the fish says that his name is Rainbow Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan.

She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.

The fish says, "Sure, I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain fly rod and reel, about an inch long; detailed and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says, "There's a fish named Rainbow Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. And he wants to use this as collateral."

She holds up the tiny rod & reel. "I mean, what the heck is this??"

The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick-knack, Patti Whack. Give the fish a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

(Contributed by anonymous)

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Funny Fish Joke #4:

A blonde wanted to go ice fishing, so after getting all of the right tools, she headed toward the nearest frozen lake. After getting comfy on her stool she started to cut a circular hole in the ice.

Then from the heavens a voice boomed, ''THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.''

Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a thermos of hot chocolate and started to cut yet another hole in the ice.

The voice boomed, ''THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.''

This time quite scared, the blonde moved to the far end of the ice.

Then she started another hole and once again the voice said, ''THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.''

The very scared blonde raised her head and said, ''Is that you, Lord?''

The voice answered, ''NO. IT IS THE MANAGER OF THE ICE RINK.''

(Contributed by Kayra Nicola)

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Funny Fish Joke #5:

A blonde was walking down the street, carrying a brown paper bag. She ran into one of her friends.

Her friend asked, "Hey! What do you have in the bag?"

She tells her friend that she has some fish in the bag.

The friend says, "Fish! Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one."

The blonde says, "I'll tell you what. If you tell me how many fish I have in this bag, I'll give you both of them."

(Contributed by anonymous)

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Funny Fish Joke #6:

O ne day while driving home from his fishing trip in the pouring rain, a man got a flat tire outside a monastery.

A monk came out and invited him inside to have dinner and spend the night. The motorist accepted. That night he had a wonderful dinner of fish and chips.

He decided to compliment the chef.

Entering the kitchen, he asked the cook, "Are you the fish friar?"

"No," the man replied, "I'm the chip monk."

(Contributed by Nicole Zamerovsky)

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Funny Fish Joke #7:

J im had awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish.

He told the fish salesman, "Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you?"

"Why do you want me to throw them at you?"

"Because I want to tell my wife that I caught them."

"Okay, but I suggest that you take the orange roughy."

"But why?"

"Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if you came by, I should tell you to take orange roughy. She prefers that for supper tonight."

(Contributed by anonymous)

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Funny Fish Joke #8:

H enry's son David, burst into the house, crying. His mother asked him what the problem was.

"Daddy and I were fishing, and he hooked a giant fish. Really bi g. Then, while he was reeling it in, the line busted and the fish got away."

"Now come on, David," his mother said,

"a big boy like you shouldn't be crying about an accident like that. You should have just laughed it off."

"But that's just what I did, mommy."

(Contributed by anonymous)

Here is other funny fish’ link cartoon:

AsianBrainCartoons